Perfectly Flawed

Tomorrow marks the end of Mental Health Awareness Week. To celebrate this special week of recognition and appreciation, I wrote a poem about depression. It can be very easy to hide behind this facade of happiness when you're depressed. Many do it to prevent being asked questions, and many do it to deceive the outside world into thinking they're okay. This poem captures the whole essence of what it feels like to have your personality eaten away by depression, and how it can often get to the point where you're tired of hiding it.  It's written in third person, to dissociate this depressive side from myself. I don't like to put myself within the same persona as this depressed side, because it's not the true version of myself. This is very much a temporary, demonic version of me, that comes and goes, but will never become who I am. With time, patience, and more effort, I know his power and influence will be minimised and silenced, but for now, this one is for h...

Have you ever felt down, played a sad song by one of your faves, and felt some of that pain ease? For 3 whole minutes, you felt understood, you felt listened to, you felt a little less alone. That is all thanks to the power of music, and how connected we are to this beautiful, expressive art.  I will not be the first, and certainly not the last, to say that music has helped me through my darkest times, and also helped me express my most happier times too. Music is a therapy like no other, because unlike having CBT to understand the mind, or Physiotherapy to understand the body, Music understands the SOUL.  The beauty of today, is that there is such a wide variety of genres, a wide enough variety to fit almost any human emotion/mood. And for that, we have to thank the expressiveness and openness of music as the Art that it is. Without music, many of us will struggle to find a way to express ourselves, or a way to release how we feel. I mean, there’s no better way to nu...

Dear Suicide, You’ve taken many innocent lives, more lives than any singular disease or virus could take in a lifetime. You’ve ripped many families apart. You’ve torn people’s minds, you’ve eaten away at the most caring and loving of us humans. You have degraded people in ways that are inexplicable. You have left scars on the bodies of people who once believed what you said to be true. You have urged him to jump off that bridge. You have manipulated her into taking them pills. You have lured him to the rope. You have dragged her to the bottom of that lake. You have claimed the lives of people who were struggling and vulnerable. People who begged and longed to be understood and loved. What they needed was support and guidance, and what did they receive? A coward living within their own mind, convincing them they were better off dead. Convincing them death was the only solution to end the pain, the only “way out” of their misery.  You have often creeped into the back of my m...

Firstly, I want to credit Halsey for the inspiration for this title (haha).  These three words have such a strong meaning to me, typically because of my past and how I’ve been treated by certain individuals. For the most part of my experience with guys, they’ve not been particularly loveable/romantic. They’ve been the kind to use me as some type of experiment to decipher whether they like guys or not. Whilst I’m flattered they chose me, it’s also such a degrading feeling and had huge implications on my self-esteem.  Put yourself into the perspective of feeling like you’re being treated as though your only worth/use is for somebody to find out “am I gay?”. It’s not, “oh let me love him, let me show him I care about him”. Instead, it’s “let me take advantage of his sexuality to find out if I like boys or not. He will be alright, he won’t take it too personally, after all, these gay guys are notorious for being slutty anyway aren’t they? Plus, I’m straight, which is an ...